Well, this is my first time writing a blog...great topic right?
Anxiety.
I'm not talking about the everyday 'anxiety struggles',
I'm talking about mild anxiety disorder. Its something i have to live with, and i know that i'm not the only one that is affected by this on a daily basis, but i just wanted to share one of my many secrets and tell you about it, yes you.
Anxiety, it needs to be talked about more, don't you think?
Anxiety prevents an average person from living their daily life freely, constant worry and thoughts that make them overflow with emotions, worrying about every situation that they went though in the past, are going through or will go through soon in the future.
Despite what it is... whether its school work, college, friends, family or just a simple situation.
Many people don't understand that its a serious topic, its not exactly something that can be joked around, especially when it affects someones life in the way that it does.
I used to be the type of person that would constantly go out with my friends and family and have a great time without any thoughts coming to my mind, its strange... i'm not sure what happened nor since when i have had it but one thing's for sure, it stopped me from doing the things i normally do... including meeting friends and family.
There's nothing worse than walking through a public space and seeing other people stare at you, despite what you're wearing, the thoughts that come to my mind completely break me.
'Do i really look that ugly today?' 'I shouldn't have bought these clothes.'
'Is my makeup messed up?' 'This is why i don't have friends'
Anxiety changed me, but its also something that i have to deal with...i rarely leave my house, because the thought of someone judging me drives me crazy...
I've distanced myself from my friends, in thought of them seeing me the way i see myself...
Messed Up.
It's not something that comes up in conversation, so nobody really knows this about me, but what would change if they knew?
I've had past experiences where I've told my friends my secrets, although in the end, they all just left, and the idea of them telling anyone else makes me anxious.
Does anyone else feel the same?
If you're in the same situation i am, just know that you're not alone..
Well...
This is one of my many secrets that I've got to tell, im not sure whether anyone will read any of my blogs but...that doesn't mean i wont be posting them! Mina is out ;)