My Shame Runs Deeper than I Thought

I had therapy today and although I have been seeing her for just over 4 years and my therapist has been there for me through the hardest things I could have gone through in my life I am still too ashamed of somethings that I cannot look at her or discuss these painful things with her.

I also thought that the internet was my way to letting out these shameful secrets but unfortuanately I have been unable to get them out of me. I have exposed somethings but those are the easiest for me to let people know. The harder more ashamed secrets within me are buried and the more things that happen that remind me of them or that make me more ashamed of myself and my secrets continue to build and I continue to be unable to expose my shameful secrets. I am just too ashamed of myself and my actions to be able to face them and expose them to anyone not even the sole person I trust that is in my life right now, my therapist.